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Evilmav2
10-13-2004, 05:54 PM
http://www.nba.com/media/bulls/curry_020206.jpg
Curry's contract demand tickles the funny bone

Think NBA preseason camps aren't a hoot? Then you haven't heard Bulls center Eddy Curry perform at the Berto Center lately.

You see, Curry didn't just lose some weight this past summer. He darned near lost a person and ...

"If he isn't careful, I'll be the new Jared on the Subway commercials," Crazy Eddy smiled.

Bada-bing!

"I might come to training camp at 225 next year," said Curry, who checked in at 281 for this one.

Bada-boom!

Then there's the biggest joke of them all: Even before the first preseason game has been played, Curry has actually told team management through his representatives that he wants close to a maximum six-year, $86 million contract to stay with the team.

Easy Come Eddy? Max contract? Now?

Ha. Ha-ha. Ha-ha-ha. Ha-ha-ha-ha. Ha-ha-ha-ha-ha. Ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha. Ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha. Ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha. Ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha ...

Sorry.

That Curry wants a contract similar to the maximum six-year, $86 million deal that Memphis Grizzlies center Pau Gasol signed recently is laughable. Last season, Gasol averaged 17.7 points and 7.7 rebounds per game and pretty much carried his team to the playoffs. But on what basis does Curry deserve a contract in the $78 million range? Because he averaged 14.7 points and 6.2 rebounds for a last-place team? Because he dropped a few pounds?

Well, la-de-da. Where should we hold the parade?

Of course, we all know the reason why Curry is in the best physical condition of his basketball life. He is about to enter the final year of his four-year, $10.4 million rookie contract. He has almost no choice except to be in the best shape of his career.

"Naw, I wouldn't say the contract had a lot to do with it," Curry shrugged with a straight face. "I'm just more mature, that's all."

Henny Youngman doesn't have a thing on this guy.

The obvious question is, why now? Where was the fitter, trimmer Curry when his teams desperately needed him the three previous seasons? Even Curry at his best wouldn't have been enough to lead them out of lotteryland, but he owed it to the fans and his teammates to bust his hump. Instead, Easy Come Eddy wheezed up and down the court for four or five minutes at a time before he would practically keel over.

Now you know why the NBA has seen its fan base erode to the extent that it has the last few years. If the thought of a kid who is paid millions of dollars to sit on the bench for a couple or three seasons isn't a big enough turn-off already, then the thought of a lazy one is even worse. Was it any surprise that our Olympic team of NBA players had so few supporters here last summer?

At least teammate Tyson Chandler gets it.

Chandler also arrived at preseason camp in the best physical condition of his brief career, but rather than proclaim himself fit for a mega-contract, the would-be free agent said he understood the concerns about his health.

"If I was a general manager, I'd do the same thing," conceded Chandler, who has a history of back trouble.

The fact is, Curry doesn't fool anyone, least of all those in the Bulls organization.

"Delusional," one member of the organization called Curry and his representatives.

One theory is that management will attempt to re-sign Curry if he performs well in the preseason the two sides have until Oct. 31 to agree to an extension but don't believe it.

"Nothing will happen until after the season," the source said.

General manager John Paxson declined comment about the contract demand, which a league source confirmed, but it was safe to say he would just as soon have a Detroit Pistons logo tattooed on his forehead as offer close to a max contract to Curry any time soon. Then-GM Jerry Krause paid Curry for his potential when he was drafted three years ago, and as Paxson was well aware, it could be financial suicide to do so again.

"We don't have to sit down with Eddy and set goals," Paxson said. "The main thing is for him to play hard and compete and help us win games. If he helps us win games, then all the other things will take care of themselves around here."

The situation smells a lot like that of guard Jamal Crawford, who also was about to become a restricted free agent at this time a year ago. Rather than work out a deal before the regular season, management elected to roll the dice. Crawford had so many dollar signs in his head that he did little more than pad his statistics, so he was shipped to the New York Knicks in a sign-and-trade deal this past summer.

By the way, Crawford and Curry are good buds.

If there's a difference, it's that Crawford controls his destiny because he handles the ball so much, whereas Curry is dependent on others. For Curry to be productive, he has to be active, and to be active, he has to be in shape. But even if Curry does have the kind of season that merits a whopper deal and does it for the right reasons, is there any guarantee that he won't get fat again?

"It's easier to keep the weight off than it is to take it off," Curry said. "I just have to continue to work hard as I've done for the last few months. You know, watch the sugar and carbs, eat in modification and not overdo it. Next year, I could take over for Kirk Hinrich at point guard."

Otherwise, there's always Zanies, you know.

fin4life
10-13-2004, 11:29 PM
Funny article. Who wrote this, he completely rips curry.

EricaLubarsky
10-13-2004, 11:37 PM
Paul Ladewski of the Daily Southtown?

It's a newspaper out of Illinois...thats all I can figure out

Evilmav2
10-13-2004, 11:49 PM
http://www.dailysouthtown.com/southtown/columns/pics/ladewski.jpg
Yup, that's Paul Ladewski of the Chicago paper, the Daily Southtown. You can read his columns here (http://www.dailysouthtown.com/index/ladewski.html) (Sorry I didn't post a link earlier)...

sike
10-14-2004, 01:10 AM
Eddy Curry's Contract Demands: Stay Puff Marshmellows!!!!!

Fah Q
10-14-2004, 05:39 AM
Originally posted by: Evilmav2
eat in modification and not overdo it.

Is that new diet terminology?

irontoad
10-14-2004, 11:55 AM
Originally posted by: sike
Eddy Curry's Contract Demands: Stay Puff Marshmellows!!!!!

Just for you, Eddy:

http://www.toymuseum.com/inside/c3/3248041.gif

sike
10-14-2004, 04:22 PM
nice one, toad i/expressions/face-icon-small-wink.gif