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dirt_dobber
10-24-2007, 09:26 AM
Basketball's trade 10 commandments
http://sports.yahoo.com/nba/news;_ylt=ArPCMRWvxU83Y94SOPoSrym8vLYF?slug=ks-kobe102207&prov=yhoo&type=lgns
By Kenny Smith, Yahoo! Sports
October 22, 2007

When should a player ask to be traded? Should he even ask at all?

I'm not talking about a guy sitting on the bench that wants more playing time. Everyone can understand that. I'm talking about your franchise player, the guy on your team who makes millions. The one who plays all the minutes, takes all the shots and has the adoring fans.

The one who plays in the second-largest sports market in the country.

(I'm talking about Kobe Bryant, of course.)

First, let's get this straight: There is no, I repeat no, loyalty in pro basketball. Many think that team owners have this loyalty to players for their service. That's far from the truth. So why should players have this unconditional loyalty? They shouldn't. However, they should have a code of ethics to abide by.

Let me tell you a quick story about teams and franchise players. When I was a kid growing up in Queens, N.Y., in the '70s, Walt "Clyde" Frazier was my man. Forget my man he was New York. With his style and bravado (don't forget his game), he helped lead the Knicks to countless wins and their first championship in franchise history. He should have retired a Knick. But the Knicks traded an aging Clyde to Cleveland, and I cried myself to sleep.

No loyalty! Should I go on?

Kareem to Los Angeles and Monroe to the Knicks. Fast-forward to Dominique out of Atlanta, Ewing to Seattle, Shaq to Miami, K.G. to Boston. All those cities that lost those stars had some kid crying his eyes out.

It's not about loyalty. It's about business deals, salary caps and states of the franchise. So again, does a player have the right to ask to be traded? Of course. But there is and always will be an unwritten law of basketball etiquette.

My favorite rapper of all time, Notorious B.I.G., recorded a song that described the unwritten codes of crime. Well, here is my now-written version of the 10 Basketball Trade Commandments. These are the rules that any player who wants to be traded should go by.

1. Never talk about being underpaid so you can be traded. No one cares about a millionaire needing more money. The cheddar breeds jealousy.

2. Never let anyone know how much you want to go. You have to move in silence. When you make a splash about being traded, you get no sympathy from fans or teammates.

3. Never trust the press. If you think you're talking off the record, think again. The media will only complicate your demands and also put out false rumors.

4. Never diss your teammates. Just because you want out doesn't mean you take the team out on the way out. The worst thing to say is you want to leave because the team needs help. Your present teammates will say, "Well, if you're that good, then why don't you carry us while your future teammates look at you like a backstabber."

5. Another person off limits in your trade tirade is the coach. Most coaches get in the trenches with you. You have to respect authority even if he can't draw up a winning play.

6. Never publicly say which cities you want to go. Why alienate all the fans in your present city when most cried every tear with you?

7. Keep your family and business completely separated. This rule is so underrated. Never have family or friends give quotes to the press. Handle your own business. You can't appear as a momma's boy.

8. Tell your agent to be an agent and not a quote machine. Let him negotiate the deal behind closed doors. No matter how you slice it, if you have your agent speak for you in the paper he makes you appear weak and greedy.

9. Never miss games, practices or team functions trying to get traded. Respect the game. (This rule could be No. 1, actually.)

10. Remember that someone has to want you to be traded.

Kobe's problem is never on the court. The problem is he breaks the unwritten rules, the etiquette rules.

It makes him easy to watch on the court but hard to root for. Without question, he is the best player to watch in the game today. You just don't want to read what he has to say in the paper or hear about it on the radio.

spreedom
10-25-2007, 08:19 AM
I'm sorry, but not only is Kenny an idiot, but he can't write at all. I love watching him get owned by Sir Charles on TNT, but that's all he's good for.

MavsX
10-25-2007, 09:09 AM
I been in this game for years, it made me a animal
Its rules to this s*it, I wrote me a manual
A step by step booklet for you to get
Your game on track, not your wig pushed back
Rule nombre uno: never let no one know
How much, dough you hold, cause you know
The cheddar breed jealousy specially
If that man f*cked up, get your a*s stuck up
Number two: never let em know your next move
Dont you know bad boys move in silence or violence
Take it from your highness (uh-huh)
I done squeezed mad clips at these cats for they bricks and chips
Number three: never trust no-bo-dy
Your momsll set that a*s up, properly gassed up
Hoodie to mask up, s*it, for that fast buck
She be layin in the bushes to light that a*s up
Number four: know you heard this before
Never get high, on your own supply
Number five: never sell no crack where you rest at
I dont care if they want a ounce, tell em bounce
Number six: that God d*mn credit, dead it
You think a crackhead payin you back, s*it forget it
Seven: this rule is so underrated
Keep your family and business completely seperated
Money and blood dont mix like two d*cks and no b*tch
Find yourself in serious s*it
Number eight: never keep no weight on you
Them cats that squeeze your guns can hold jobs too
Number nine shoulda been number one to me
If you aint gettin bags stay the f*ck from police (uh-huh)
If n*ggaz think you snitchin aint tryin listen
They be sittin in your kitchen, waitin to start hittin
Number ten: a strong word called consignment
Strictly for live men, not for freshmen
If you aint got the clientele say hell no
Cause they gon want they money rain sleet hail snow
Follow these rules youll have mad bread to break up
If not, twenty-four years, on the wake up
Slug hit your temple, watch your frame shake up
Caretaker did your makeup, when you pass
Your girl f*cked my man jake up, heard in three weeks
She sniffed a whole half of cake up
Heard she suck a good d*ck, and can hook a steak up
Gotta go gotta go, more pies to bake up, word up, uhh


*edited for U2

nowhereman
10-25-2007, 02:35 PM
LOLZ