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Originally Posted by Big Boy Laroux
hey, i credit the kid. more power to him. and good luck to him. I made the same commitment when i was his age, and couldn't keep it. and i don't feel i was ripping him. I made a joke, which everyone else on this board does. get over it.
not to turn this into a religious topic (ok, i will), but it was a lot easier to save sex til marriage when people were getting married at his age (14), in the time when the bible was written. I just don't feel that that aspect of the Bible still applies in this current time, and I don't judge anyone who chooses to have premarital sex.
it's a reality nowadays. i'm not saying go out and be a whore. but like someone mentioned above, you run the risk of being VERY unhappy in a marriage if you are not compatible sexually. people like to say it's not a big deal, but it is. Sex is not just something to do for procreation. it's a very important part of the connection between two people in a relationship.
people should be open about sex. should be able to talk about it freely. should be able to know if you're compatible. i can easily see how not ever having sex, then being unhappy sexually with the person you marry (because of the incompatibility), can lead to infedility. so what's worse, cheating, or premarital sex? or are they equal to you?
And what about oral sex? is that ok? seems to be in the same boat, but i've known MANY people who do everything but intercourse, and say, "hey, it's ok, i didnt have sex. god is cool with me".
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That last part is the grey area. Hey like i said, its not my place to judge so im not saying that everyone needs to do the same thing but i have gotten tired of the way that people who havent had sex have become viewed as freaks of some sort. Now when i went to a church meeting at tech and everyone in the group(this is a group of college kids mind you) all said they had never kissed a girl i got out of there like a bat out of hell. That is a little scary.
As for the sex issue with regards to marriage, if you go to any christian university you will find ALOT of people that get married at extremely young ages. I personally believe that this is due largely due to the no sex before marriage belief. If you really really want to have sex and you dont believe you can do so before marriage there is really only one option assuming you are so dead set against premarital sex. I personally think that premarital sex is the lesser of two evils in that scenario or the one you mentioned but I do believe that it is possible to end up having a completely happy marriage even if you marry someone you havent had sex with.
Though i do agree that sex is an important part of marriage. Im 20 and im not married so i havent ever actually been to one and im relying on tv/movies for this which is a bad idea but in this case i believe its a fair assumption but when couples have problems and go to counselors dont they generally ask about the couples sex life? That would seem to me proof that sex is an important part of a marriage but its not a necesarry part of a dating relationship.