[Big Boy Laroux]

5-0, but how do you KNOW that? you don't know. say you have faith that that's how it will happen. but you don't KNOW.

A) you mean to tell me you wouldn't picture someone else, even if you're a virgin? come on now... you don't have to imagine someone you've actually been with. your virgin wife will be thinking of Brad Pitt. you might as well be thinking of Jessica Alba.

B) of course. that's a fact. I agree with this. abstinence is the only way. let's only teach abstinence in schools!

C) do we really, truly, know this? again, a belief. but i can't dog on anyone's beliefs, so no comment here.

D) again, my opinion differs as to what a great gift is. she'll appreciate the first time, then quickly want to forget about it because of how awful you are. I think this "great gift" thing is thrown around too loosely. you're assuming she wants it. but she'll probably be asking, "does this come with a receipt?"

E) I will say that this is commendable. but maybe it'd be better to just resist cheeseburgers. you can say you had willpower because of that.

Let's keep going!

(i feel i'm an expert on this matter because i tried that commitment and failed. must have been all the women throwing themseleves at me. but hey, i can't resist a good cheeseburger either.)