An Olive Branch To Conservatives

[kg_veteran]

I guess Michael Moore assumes that conservatives behave like he does and go into some sort of depressed hibernation when the election doesn't go their way.

Of course, upon reading Moore's gloating, it's clear that he doesn't understand WHY the Democrats won...

***

Michael Moore's pledge
The liberal documentary/propaganda filmmaker extends an olive branch to disheartened conservatives.
By Michael Moore
November 17, 2006

link


I WOULD LIKE TO extend an olive branch. Those of you who consider yourselves conservative and usually vote Republican have not had a very good couple of weeks. Trust me, I know how this feels.

In fact, those of us on the other side of the fence don't really know what it's like to win, so if we seem a bit awkward right now (were we supposed to vote for the majority leader the speaker said to vote for, or stick to our promise to the other guy?), forgive us.

I know you are dismayed at the results of last week's election. You've got to be freaking out about what this bunch of tree-hugging, latte-sipping, men-kissing-men advocates will do now that the country is in our hands. I don't blame you. We'd never admit it, but we secretly admire you because you know how to chop down a tree, take your coffee black and enjoy watching women kissing women. Good on you!

What I don't want is for you to drop into the deep funk we liberals have been in for two-plus decades. Yes, your Republican revolution is over, but hang in there. And do not despair. I, and the millions who voted for Democrats, have no interest in revenge for the last 12 years. In fact, let me make 12 promises as to how we will treat you, the minority, in the coming years.

Thus, here is "A Liberal's Pledge to Disheartened Conservatives":

1) We will always respect you. We will never, ever, call you "unpatriotic" simply because you disagree with us. In fact, we encourage you to dissent and disagree with us.

2) We will let you marry whomever you want (even though some among us consider your Republican behavior to be "different" or "immoral"). Who you marry is none of our business. Love, and be in love — it's a wonderful gift.

3) We will not spend your grandchildren's money on our personal whims or to enrich our friends. It's your checkbook too, and we will balance it for you.

4) When we soon bring our sons and daughters home from Iraq, we will bring your sons and daughters home too. We promise never to send your kids off to war based on some amateur Power Point presentation cooked up by men who have never been to war.

5) When we make America the last Western democracy to have universal health coverage, and all Americans are able to get help when they fall ill, we promise that you too will be able to see a doctor, regardless of your ability to pay. And when stem cell research delivers treatments and cures for diseases that afflict you and your loved ones, we'll make sure those advances are available to you and your family too.

6) When we clean up our air and water, you too will be able to breathe the cleaner air and drink the purer water. When we put an end to global warming, you will no longer have to think about buying oceanfront property in Yuma.

7) Should a mass murderer ever kill 3,000 people on our soil, we will devote every single resource to tracking him down and bringing him to justice. Immediately. We will protect you.

8) We will never stick our nose in your bedroom or your womb. What you do there as consenting adults is your business. We will continue to count your age from the moment you were born, not the moment you were conceived.

9) We will not take away your hunting guns. If you need an automatic weapon or a handgun to kill a bird or a deer, then you really aren't much of a hunter and you should, perhaps, take up another sport. In the meantime, we will arm the deer to make it a fairer fight.

10) When we raise the minimum wage, we will raise it for your employees too. They will use that money to buy more things, which means you will get the money back! And when women are finally paid what men make, we will pay conservative women that wage too.

11) We will respect your religious beliefs, even when you don't practice those beliefs. In fact, we will actively seek to promote your most radical religious beliefs ("Blessed are the peacemakers," "Love your enemies," "It is easier for a camel to go through the eye of a needle than for a rich man to enter the kingdom of God" and "Whatever you did for one of the least of these brothers of mine, you did for me"). We will let people in other countries know that God doesn't just bless America, he blesses everyone. We will discourage religious intolerance and fanaticism — starting here at home.

12) We will not tolerate politicians who are corrupt and break the law. And we promise you we will go after the corrupt politicians on our side first. If we fail to do this, we need you to call us on it. Simply because we are in power does not give us the right to turn our heads the other way when our party goes astray. Please perform this important duty as the loyal opposition.

I promise all of the above to you because this is your country too. You are every bit as American as we are. We are all in this together. We sink or swim as one. Thank you for your years of service to this country and for giving us the opportunity to see if we can make things a bit better for our 300 million fellow Americans — and for the rest of the world.

Now pull yourself together and let's go have a Frappuccino.

[FINtastic]

10) When we raise the minimum wage, we will raise it for your employees too. They will use that money to buy more things, which means you will get the money back! And when women are finally paid what men make, we will pay conservative women that wage too.

I wish Michael Moore took the time to learn a little bit about economics before he made a dumb claim like this. Too bad things don't work this way, and raising the minimum wage ain't the win-win Michael Moore and his ilk would like to make it out to be.

[chumdawg]

I'm so happy they are going to end global warming!

[Flacolaco]

This is the most condescending piece of garbage I've ever read.

Who exactly gave him the authority to speak for all Democrats?

this is my favorite:

2) We will let you marry whomever you want....

WE will LET YOU?

Oh thanks so much buddy. thanks for your permission.

stfu

[Evilmav2]

13.) We will also raise your taxes, grossly over-regulate your businesses, nurture and grow to gross obesity governmental bureaucracies and agencies at all levels of government, restrict your rights to bear arms, stack the courts with leftist, baby boomer internationalist judges whose crass agenda-driven rulings will continue to modify American law without paying one whit of heed to the will of the American voting public or their representative legislators, and in a slaveringly mercenary drive to curry the favor of voting American Hispanics, we will actively help to create a bilingual United States of America by forcing local, federal, and state governmental agencies to recognize the Mexican language as something that cannot be 'discriminated' against, and we will actively resist any private or governmental attempts to bring any kind of order to our Southern borders or to the illegal immigration epidemic...

Oh yeah, and we will continue to fight to shrink the budget of the United States armed forces (After all, do we really need to spend more money on our defense than the rest of the world combined? I mean, if only the cowboy chimp had worked with international agencies like the UN, or Greenpeace, or maybe Unicef, then maybe the terrorists wouldn't have such strong reasons to hate us. And wouldn't we be living in a better, more caring society if we spent that money on social welfare entitlements and health care anyway?), and we will endeavor to bring the Cowboy Chimp to congressional impeachment hearings, regardless of the merits of whatever impeachable offenses we eventually end up being able to find or fabricate...

[Flacolaco]

Originally Posted by Evilmav2

13.) We will also raise your taxes, grossly over-regulate your businesses, nurture and grow to gross obesity governmental bureaucracies and agencies at all levels of government, restrict your rights to bear arms, stack the courts with leftist, baby boomer internationalist judges whose crass agenda-driven rulings will continue to modify American law without paying one whit of heed to the will of the American voting public or their representative legislators, and in a slaveringly mercenary drive to curry the favor of voting American Hispanics, we will actively help to create a bilingual United States of America by forcing local, federal, and state governmental agencies to recognize the Mexican language as something that cannot be 'discriminated' against, and we will actively resist any private or governmental attempts to bring any kind of order to our Southern borders or to the illegal immigration epidemic...

Oh yeah, and we will continue to fight to shrink the budget of the United States armed forces (After all, do we really need to spend more money on our defense than the rest of the world combined? I mean, if only the cowboy chimp had worked with international agencies like the UN, or Greenpeace, or maybe Unicef, then maybe the terrorists wouldn't have such strong reasons to hate us. And wouldn't we be living in a better, more caring society if we spent that money on social welfare entitlements and health care anyway?), and we will endeavor to bring the Cowboy Chimp to congressional impeachment hearings, regardless of the merits of whatever impeachable offenses we eventually will be able to find or fabricate...

Amen.

[dude1394]

Shut up you fat bastard maggot.

[dude1394]

You've got to be freaking out about what this bunch of tree-hugging, latte-sipping, men-kissing-men advocates will do now that the country is in our hands.

This dumb fat maggot bastard somehow thinks that congress being under democratic "control" for two years constitutes having the country being in "their" hands. 2 other branchs you dumbass.

[u2sarajevo]

Originally Posted by Moore

You've got to be freaking out about what this bunch of tree-hugging, latte-sipping, men-kissing-men advocates will do now that the country is in our hands.

Ummmmm.... Country in "your" hands? You've got the Legislative Branch.... Last time I checked we had the Executive and a majority of the Judicial Branches....

So, yeah.... whatever....

[Usually Lurkin]

any surprised that it looks like he plagiarized this from some poster at Democratic Underground?
http://michellemalkin.com/archives/006381.htm


Moore's red meat (or rather, blue meat) got thumbs up from Daily Kos commenters. But not all the lefties on the Internet are singing Moore's praises.

Jim Hoft noticed this long Democratic Underground thread by a liberal blogger justifiably upset with Moore's apparent cribbing of her open letter to dismayed conservatives published five days before Moore's.

Here's a bit of her compare-and-contrast:

Moore: A Liberal's Pledge to Disheartened Conservatives
Me: Dear dismayed conservatives:

Moore: I, and my fellow signatories, hereby make these promises to you:
Me: I hereby make these promises to you.

Moore: Should a mass murderer ever kill 3,000 people on our soil, we will devote every single resource to tracking him down and bringing him to justice. Immediately. We will protect you.
Me: We will protect your lives and livelihoods.

Moore: We will always respect you for your conservative beliefs.
Me: We will listen to and respect your beliefs.

Moore: We will respect your religious beliefs, even when you don't put those beliefs into practice. // We will let you marry whomever you want, even when some of us consider your behavior to be "different" or "immoral."
Me: We will never try to force you to change your religion, sexual orientation, or first language.

Moore: We will never stick our nose in your bedroom or your womb. What you do there as consenting adults is your business. We will continue to count your age from the moment you were born, not the moment you were conceived.
Me: We will do our best to reduce the number of abortions in our country.

Moore: We will not tolerate politicians who are corrupt and who are bought and paid for by the rich.
Me: We will have no tolerance for corruption and cronyism, even in our own party.

Moore: And we promise you we will go after the corrupt politicians on our side FIRST.
Me: ESPECIALLY in our own party.

Moore:We will never, ever, call you "unpatriotic" simply because you disagree with us. In fact, we encourage you to dissent and disagree with us.
Me: We will never tell you that you are unpatriotic. We will never tell you that your opinion doesn't count...

...Moore: If we fail to do this, we need you to call us on it.
Me: If we forget this, please, please, please, remind us.

Moore: You are every bit as American as we are.
Me: We need you to do this. You are America as much as we are. Let's go.

The DU commenters are siding with the blogger. As one commenter wrote in response to one of Moore's defenders who mused that "great minds think alike:"

"Nobody thinks THAT much alike. Smells like plagiarism to me. And that's a shame."

Another suggests:

"Please get a camera and track him down. It'd make a hilarious meta-movie."

They report, you decide.

To be fair to Moore, the manifesto form is hardly an original concept. But it would have been nice for the Voice of the Common Man to tip his hat.

[Epitome22]

"This dumb fat maggot bastard somehow thinks that congress being under democratic "control" for two years constitutes having the country being in "their" hands. 2 other branchs you dumbass."

Except they won't have control for just two years. As the Northeast becomes more partisan and the interior west trends more Democratic, and the GOP is relegated to a rump party of the south, they will be in control for many years.

In a sense, this is America turning back to the natural competent governing of the country. The 12 year GOP control being a nasty hisotircal abberation. They won't make that mistake again.

[dude1394]

Dream on brotha'. If for nothing else you "might" keep the urban northeast but the senate trends republican.

And we'll obviously see how "competent" they will be...Seeing as how they haven't done anything but say no and kowtow to their labor, abortion/environmental constituencies for about 12 years, it's hard to tell.

You may call that competent, I call it pandering.

Oh...and the first thing out of their mouths are
- bring back the draft.
- tax cuts for the 100k-500k
- look at defunding a security fence.

[Epitome22]

Sorry dude. But your party is quickly becoming one of a rump of regional conservative reactionaries. The Northeast isn't just liberal, but partisan liberal. The Rust belt states are moving toward us and the mountain west states are going Dem at a phenomenal rate. That says nothing about the Southwest, where Demographic changes are push those states into the D column as well. I'd also like to thank your camp's anti-hispanic racism these past few years for formenting that chain of events as well.

The Democrats are the party of America. The Republicans are the party of Mississippi.

[dude1394]

The democrats are the party of the pander. You sort of sound like some sort of kid who's team finally managed to win one against his big brother who's been feeling sorry for you.

The problem with the democrats is that they have no policies. They are more conservative than the republicans ever thought about being when it comes to reforming anything.

I sort of wish the dems would stay in office long enough so I could see the backlash when they finally tell the social security folks. "Oh well, crap...no check for you, we had our heads stuck so far up our rear ends that we decided to do nothing. It was good politics though, huh? "

[purplefrog]

Originally Posted by Epitome22

Sorry dude. But your party is quickly becoming one of a rump of regional conservative reactionaries. The Northeast isn't just liberal, but partisan liberal. The Rust belt states are moving toward us and the mountain west states are going Dem at a phenomenal rate. That says nothing about the Southwest, where Demographic changes are push those states into the D column as well. I'd also like to thank your camp's anti-hispanic racism these past few years for formenting that chain of events as well.

The Democrats are the party of America. The Republicans are the party of Mississippi.

What is is the idealogy of the Dems that is sweeping across America? The Dem winners of '06 were mostly moderates. One could argue that the Dems have left their failed liberal idealogy behind in order to become more competitive. Will they govern from the center? That remains to be seen because most of the congressional chairs will be old school Democrats. It will be interesting to see what happens with the Democratic party, but this past election certainly does not suggest the American people have decided to embrace a far left agenda or that there is a trend moving in that direction.