Is it wrong to date your best friends little sister? - Page 4 - Dallas-Mavs.com Forums

Big Boy Laroux · 08-30-2006, 11:01 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Five-ofan

Ill answer both the for the most part and this part, no its not a deal breaker. We are not meant to be judges of others. You love her, imo you marry her(assuming she is willing). You dont, you dont. The for the most part means that even christians sin(this is pretty much one of if not the essential beliefs of christianity after the belief in god and christ) They could be a christian who slipped OR they could be someone who converted after losing their virginity.

so don't you think your future wife could be equally as forgiving?

and i know the beliefs of christianity. thanks.

nashtymavsfan13 · 08-30-2006, 11:02 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Big Boy Laroux

isn't it great?

hey, nashty, this isn't about me "liking" your replies. it's your faith. your beliefs. i haven't had a problem with anything you've said so far. i've just presented my opinion as well, which happens to be a differing opinioon based on my faith and experiences.

Ok. I'm glad you haven't. I just meant that my answer would basically be my beliefs, not my opinion.

Big Boy Laroux · 08-30-2006, 11:03 PM

well, that's a fine line there. beliefs basically are opinions. neither is based in absolute fact. beliefs are essentially just stronger opinions.

nashtymavsfan13 · 08-30-2006, 11:05 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Big Boy Laroux

so don't you think your future wife could be equally as forgiving?

and i know the beliefs of christianity. thanks.

That's the answer that would come from most non Christians, because in a way it makes sense from their perspective. What Christians believe is that since Christ went through all that, living a perfect life and then dieing for us, that if we truly love him we WANT to obey him. We seek to obey him. He said that sex should only happen between married couples. So the reason we don't have sex outside of marriage is to obey that, because we love him. Yes he would forgive us, and our future wife most liekly would too, but there would always be that guilt and regret.

Five-ofan · 08-30-2006, 11:05 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Big Boy Laroux

so don't you think your future wife could be equally as forgiving?

and i know the beliefs of christianity. thanks.

I understand you know the beliefs of christianity but since they are the foundation of this decision they are worth mentioning. In christianity we believe everything is forgiven. In general yes i believe it would be better if your wife was a virgin as well (the unequally yoked passage comes to mind) but like i said its not a deal breaker. There are very few things that are absolute deal breakers in christianity aside from the obvious belief in christ. That said, and this is my belief, the purpose of christianity is not to push as far as you possibly can while just barely skimming in but to live your life for christ as well as you can.

Edit to rephrase the purpose of christianity is to develop a relationship with god and to strengthen said relationship as much as you can. Not to go all sunday school, actually thats exactly what im doing, Sin builds a wall between you and god which hinders that relationship. Yes he forgives it all and that removes the wall the instant you confess and repent of your sins but the wall is still there for at least a little while.

nashtymavsfan13 · 08-30-2006, 11:09 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Five-ofan

That said, and this is my belief, the purpose of christianity is not to push as far as you possibly can while just barely skimming in but to live your life for christ as well as you can.

Right. Your desire should be to live your life for Christ, for his glory. For example, if their was a landmine in a field, would you try to get as close as you could to it without triggering it? No, it doesn't make sense. Same thing here. You don't try to barely get by while still living however you want. If you're truly a Christian, you'll want to live your life completley for Christ.

nashtymavsfan13 · 08-30-2006, 11:11 PM

Another thing. The greatest joy in life is to know God is always with you. The greatest thing is to have a very strong relationship with him, and to completley rely on him. If you are constantly sinning your relationship is not getting stronger, and you won't experience that full joy, because you'll still be holding on to things of the world.

Big Boy Laroux · 08-30-2006, 11:13 PM

that landmine could hurt someone else! i'd get one of those minefield clearers and run through it. or maybe just toss a rock at it from further away (in this analogy, this would be the equivalent of heavy petting).

nashtymavsfan13 · 08-30-2006, 11:15 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Big Boy Laroux

that landmine could hurt someone else! i'd get one of those minefield clearers and run through it. or maybe just toss a rock at it from further away (in this analogy, this would be the equivalent of heavy petting).

I think you are missing the point.

Five-ofan · 08-30-2006, 11:16 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Big Boy Laroux

that landmine could hurt someone else! i'd get one of those minefield clearers and run through it. or maybe just toss a rock at it from further away (in this analogy, this would be the equivalent of heavy petting).

But if you know where and what it is, and you setting it off helps NO ONE else ie the bomb somehow magically replaced itself, would you still do this or would you just stay the heck away from it. That is a much closer comparison imo.

Big Boy Laroux · 08-30-2006, 11:17 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by nashtymavsfan13

I think you are missing the point.

am i now? in my way, i avoid the landmine, and don't leave it there for someone else. Just call me Princess Di.

Big Boy Laroux · 08-30-2006, 11:18 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Five-ofan

But if you know where and what it is, and you setting it off helps NO ONE else ie the bomb somehow magically replaced itself, would you still do this or would you just stay the heck away from it. That is a much closer comparison imo.

now that's just crazy talk. this isn't a video game. landmines just don't replace themselves.

but i'll play along. i think i'd keep throwing rocks at it. sounds like fun.

Five-ofan · 08-30-2006, 11:18 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Big Boy Laroux

am i now? in my way, i avoid the landmine, and don't leave it there for someone else. Just call me Princess Di.

How exactly are you gonna remove sex as a temptation for everyone else short of massive castration or instant marriages when you are born. Neither seems like a good idea to me and those are the only ways that you would be removing the "mine" from everyone elses problems.

Five-ofan · 08-30-2006, 11:19 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Big Boy Laroux

now that's just crazy talk. this isn't a video game. landmines just don't replace themselves.

but i'll play along. i think i'd keep throwing rocks at it. sounds like fun.

its not a perfect analogy. BTW, how did a thread that i figured would get 20 replies max end up at 132 and counting?

nashtymavsfan13 · 08-30-2006, 11:19 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by nashtymavsfan13

That's the answer that would come from most non Christians, because in a way it makes sense from their perspective. What Christians believe is that since Christ went through all that, living a perfect life and then dieing for us, that if we truly love him we WANT to obey him. We seek to obey him. He said that sex should only happen between married couples. So the reason we don't have sex outside of marriage is to obey that, because we love him. Yes he would forgive us, and our future wife most liekly would too, but there would always be that guilt and regret.

This is the main point.

Big Boy Laroux · 08-30-2006, 11:20 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Five-ofan

How exactly are you gonna remove sex as a temptation for everyone else short of massive castration or instant marriages when you are born. Neither seems like a good idea to me and those are the only ways that you would be removing the "mine" from everyone elses problems.

or you could remove the negative connotation of "temptation" from sex. hmmmmmmmm...

Big Boy Laroux · 08-30-2006, 11:21 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Five-ofan

its not a perfect analogy. BTW, how did a thread that i figured would get 20 replies max end up at 132 and counting?

i'd like to think we 3 have something to do with that.

Five-ofan · 08-30-2006, 11:22 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Big Boy Laroux

or you could remove the negative connotation of "temptation" from sex. hmmmmmmmm...

So hey lets just completely rewrite a religion because it isnt convenient?

Big Boy Laroux · 08-30-2006, 11:24 PM

rewrite what? the passages that say "no premarital sex"? oh that's right, there aren't any.

The Bible is all based on interpretation. we interpret certain passages to mean that something is bad, good, etc. passages say not to be sexually immoral. what if my premarital sex is just missionary position? i don't see anything immoral about that.

Five-ofan · 08-30-2006, 11:27 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Big Boy Laroux

rewrite what? the passages that say "no premarital sex"? oh that's right, there aren't any.

The Bible is all based on interpretation. we interpret certain passages to mean that something is bad, good, etc. passages say not to be sexually immoral. what if my premarital sex is just missionary position? i don't see anything immoral about that.

I dont have a bible right here so i cant find it out but give me a day or so and i can find you some passages that tell you about no sex before marriage.

Big Boy Laroux · 08-30-2006, 11:30 PM

there are passages in which Paul says that women that have lust should get married instead of acting on the lust. but that assumes lust. what about two unmarried people in love. soulmates, if you will.

i said it before, but to me it's better to be open about all of this than rush into marriage because you're lustful. seems to me that God would want people getting married for the right reasons.

Big Boy Laroux · 08-30-2006, 11:31 PM

just realized i never voted in the original poll. gotta do that now.

Five-ofan · 08-30-2006, 11:34 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Big Boy Laroux

there are passages in which Paul says that women that have lust should get married instead of acting on the lust. but that assumes lust. what about two unmarried people in love. soulmates, if you will.

i said it before, but to me it's better to be open about all of this than rush into marriage because you're lustful. seems to me that God would want people getting married for the right reasons.

Youre lapsing into old points. I already pointed out that i believe premarital sex to be the lesser of two evils in that scenario(by alot actually imo) The point is that if your faith is strong enough, you can avoid both. There is nothing that says you have to have sex by a certain age so you can either get married by 19 or have premarital sex or something like that.

nashtymavsfan13 · 08-30-2006, 11:38 PM

If you have lust you're supposed to pray to be able to control it. You won't rush into marriage, because it won't work out unless it's God's will for that person to be your spouse, and premarital sex is a sin and God doesn't think of one sin being worse than another, they are all equally bad to him and they are all against him.

nashtymavsfan13 · 08-30-2006, 11:46 PM

Here's some that apply pretty well:

I Chorinthians 6:18-19

18Flee from sexual immorality. All other sins a man commits are outside his body, but he who sins sexually sins against his own body. 19Do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit, who is in you, whom you have received from God? You are not your own.

Ephesians 5:3

3But among you there must not be even a hint of sexual immorality, or of any kind of impurity, or of greed, because these are improper for God's holy people.

Five-ofan · 08-30-2006, 11:48 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by nashtymavsfan13

If you have lust you're supposed to pray to be able to control it. You won't rush into marriage, because it won't work out unless it's God's will for that person to be your spouse, and premarital sex is a sin and God doesn't think of one sin being worse than another, they are all equally bad to him and they are all against him.

I think the passage which i believe is from Job, I made a covenant with mine eyes not to look on a woman with lust, would apply here.

mqywaaah · 08-30-2006, 11:53 PM

Hey any developments 5-0? Im on the edge of my seat.

j/k

Just wanna know whats happening.

nashtymavsfan13 · 08-30-2006, 11:56 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Big Boy Laroux

what if my premarital sex is just missionary position? i don't see anything immoral about that.

You're not supposed to marry or even date a non Christian. It's a lot easier to have them make a megative impact on you than iut is for them to make a positive impact on them. Engaging in a sinful act with a non believer will bring you further from God, not bring the other person closer to him.

2 Chorinthians 6:14

14Do not be yoked together with unbelievers. For what do righteousness and wickedness have in common? Or what fellowship can light have with darkness?

Five-ofan · 08-30-2006, 11:56 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by mqywaaah

Hey any developments 5-0? Im on the edge of my seat.

j/k

Just wanna know whats happening.

We r going to watch a movie friday. That doesnt really mean anything though since we have watched movies together for the last year or so. You know now that i think of it, the person who mentioned it wouldnt change my relationship with her much was honestly right. we already do essentially everything a dating couple does besides sex and or kissing. We go out to eat and watch movies which in a small town is essentially about it for dates. As for actually making something official and truly dating, i am pretty certain we will actually do that at some point this weekend but i havent fully decided yet.

Five-ofan · 08-30-2006, 11:57 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by nashtymavsfan13

You're not supposed to marry or even date a non Christian. It's a lot easier to have them make a megative impact on you than iut is for them to make a positive impact on them. Engaging in a sinful act with a non believer will bring you further from God, not bring the other person closer to him.

2 Chorinthians 6:14

14Do not be yoked together with unbelievers. For what do righteousness and wickedness have in common? Or what fellowship can light have with darkness?

The unequally yoked passage i mentioned earlier.

nashtymavsfan13 · 08-30-2006, 11:58 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Five-ofan

I think the passage which i believe is from Job, I made a covenant with mine eyes not to look on a woman with lust, would apply here.

Yeah, it's from Job 31:1 and it applies here.

nashtymavsfan13 · 08-31-2006, 12:00 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Five-ofan

The unequally yoked passage i mentioned earlier.

Yeah, just wanted to reiterate that by explaining more thoroughly and providing the exact passage.

raefformvp · 08-31-2006, 12:03 AM

He's the best I've ever had!

His virginity is by far the best gift he has ever given me. Better than diamond earrings, my beautiful engagement ring, etc. I wouldn't trade it for the world!

I ran around with some crazy girls in my high school and college days. They truly believed that there was no way they would marry a guy without test driving him first. When they found out my husband and I were waiting for marriage, they were just baffled. They asked me what would happen if we got into the marriage and the sex was just terrible. My response was simply this: my God created the universe. He brought my husband up in a certain way and myself in a certain way. He knew that the two of us would marry at 25. My God doesn't make mistakes. I trust him with everything I have. If He can create this beautiful world we live in, then most certainly He knew exactly what He was doing when he placed the two of us at Harold Patterson Park a little over 10 years ago. He put us together, so how could we not be compatible. Without going into to much personal detail, I will tell you that my wedding night was the best 5 minutes of my life (soooooooooooooooooooooooooooo kidding). In all seriousness, my wedding night was so beautiful, romantic, and God-breathed, that I wouldn't change a single second of it! God doesn't make mistakes. I wish there were more young people like Nashty. I think this wolrd would be a better place if there was.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Big Boy Laroux

but raef, great gift aside, how is he in the sack? Be honest.

made sure to put extra smilies in there that time. whew!

and in seriousness, if you can stick with it nashty, i commend you. it is a tough commitment, and i applaud anyone that can do it (unless you're ugly. if you're ugly, it's easy to do...

).

as far as the gift thing is concerned... what's a better gift - your virginity, or being experienced enough to actually be able to please your woman? (i know, i know, some people can do both... or at least they claim it). but again, young gents, do not go overboard. too much sex, and your future mate will feel inadequate. unless you marry a whore. anyway, if you have sex, find a happy medium on number of partners. like, let's say 20. that's a nice even number.

man, i'm full of great advice today.

Five-ofan · 08-31-2006, 12:09 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by raefformvp

He's the best I've ever had!

His virginity is by far the best gift he has ever given me. Better than diamond earrings, my beautiful engagement ring, etc. I wouldn't trade it for the world!

I ran around with some crazy girls in my high school and college days. They truly believed that there was no way they would marry a guy without test driving him first. When they found out my husband and I were waiting for marriage, they were just baffled. They asked me what would happen if we got into the marriage and the sex was just terrible. My response was simply this: my God created the universe. He brought my husband up in a certain way and myself in a certain way. He knew that the two of us would marry at 25. My God doesn't make mistakes. I trust him with everything I have. If He can create this beautiful world we live in, then most certainly He knew exactly what He was doing when he placed the two of us at Harold Patterson Park a little over 10 years ago. He put us together, so how could we not be compatible. Without going into to much personal detail, I will tell you that my wedding night was the best 5 minutes of my life (soooooooooooooooooooooooooooo kidding). In all seriousness, my wedding night was so beautiful, romantic, and God-breathed, that I wouldn't change a single second of it! God doesn't make mistakes. I wish there were more young people like Nashty. I think this wolrd would be a better place if there was.

I concurr about the thing with nasthy. The world could use more people who believe that. Hope he lasts through his teen years which are BY FAR the hardest time to go through with that belief. Glad to hear the other part as well.

nashtymavsfan13 · 08-31-2006, 12:23 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by raefformvp

He's the best I've ever had!

His virginity is by far the best gift he has ever given me. Better than diamond earrings, my beautiful engagement ring, etc. I wouldn't trade it for the world!

I ran around with some crazy girls in my high school and college days. They truly believed that there was no way they would marry a guy without test driving him first. When they found out my husband and I were waiting for marriage, they were just baffled. They asked me what would happen if we got into the marriage and the sex was just terrible. My response was simply this: my God created the universe. He brought my husband up in a certain way and myself in a certain way. He knew that the two of us would marry at 25. My God doesn't make mistakes. I trust him with everything I have. If He can create this beautiful world we live in, then most certainly He knew exactly what He was doing when he placed the two of us at Harold Patterson Park a little over 10 years ago. He put us together, so how could we not be compatible. Without going into to much personal detail, I will tell you that my wedding night was the best 5 minutes of my life (soooooooooooooooooooooooooooo kidding). In all seriousness, my wedding night was so beautiful, romantic, and God-breathed, that I wouldn't change a single second of it! God doesn't make mistakes. I wish there were more young people like Nashty. I think this wolrd would be a better place if there was.

There you have it BBL, the best gift a man can give his wife, coming from a woman herself.

D-Ball · 08-31-2006, 12:58 AM

I think this could use a new thread. As a sort of disclaimer, I hope we are not trying to change anyone's mind here. This argument is older than the combined ages of everyone who has ever visited this site. We have all had to make this choice at least once; it's universal.

Here's my take: If God recognizes people within the bonds of marriage, do we really need the white dress and the marriage certificate for soul mates to be forever linked? Does he care about our ceremonies?

And isn't this ceremony a signal of a sexist society where women are seen as property? Isn't that why the woman changes her last name from her father's to her husband's, and the father pays for the wedding (dowry)? Isn't the white dress like a 'USDA' stamp on a piece of beef - 'this is quality merchandise?' Isn't this part of the sexual double-standard between men and women? Wasn't this the purpose of 'finding a good husband' because the woman could not fulfill her duty on this planet without being a mother and tending to her home?

I'm speaking in hyperbole here, but the fact remains that I don't think God cares if we stand inside of a church and say 'I do.' It seems to me that two people who love each other, commit to one another, and make the conscious choice to be together forever would be united in the bonds of marriage without the priest.

Also, how can the church recognize a divorce, saying there is no sacrimental union, and claim that the sexual relationship wasn't outside marriage and, therefore, a sin?

Five-ofan · 08-31-2006, 01:09 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by D-Ball

I think this could use a new thread. As a sort of disclaimer, I hope we are not trying to change anyone's mind here. This argument is older than the combined ages of everyone who has ever visited this site. We have all had to make this choice at least once; it's universal.

Here's my take: If God recognizes people within the bonds of marriage, do we really need the white dress and the marriage certificate for soul mates to be forever linked? Does he care about our ceremonies?

And isn't this ceremony a signal of a sexist society where women are seen as property? Isn't that why the woman changes her last name from her father's to her husband's, and the father pays for the wedding (dowry)? Isn't the white dress like a 'USDA' stamp on a piece of beef - 'this is quality merchandise?' Isn't this part of the sexual double-standard between men and women? Wasn't this the purpose of 'finding a good husband' because the woman could not fulfill her duty on this planet without being a mother and tending to her home?

I'm speaking in hyperbole here, but the fact remains that I don't think God cares if we stand inside of a church and say 'I do.' It seems to me that two people who love each other, commit to one another, and make the conscious choice to be together forever would be united in the bonds of marriage without the priest.

Also, how can the church recognize a divorce, saying there is no sacrimental union, and claim that the sexual relationship wasn't outside marriage and, therefore, a sin?

Divorce is pretty universally recognized as a sin. Divorce goes back to Henry the 8th saying essentially im the pope and i can do what i want. As for marriage, i actually agree with you because alot of the people in the biblical times didnt go through a marriage ceremony, i would agree to a certain extent because i dont think the ceremony is what makes a marriage holy. Its just a slippery slope to go down because essentially once you have sex with someone, in that theory, you have married them. If they dont believe the same way there is no way you can know they wont leave for greener pastures and if they do believe the same they wont mind waiting.

As for the hyperbole, im glad you admitted as such. You realize that weddings are generally known as the brides day and the thing with the names is just tradition which isnt even always observed.

fluid.forty.one · 08-31-2006, 01:37 AM

I can't believe the "greatest story ever told" is being discussed on a Mavs forum

chumdawg · 08-31-2006, 01:44 AM

Anyone who would leave a land mine untouched, so that an innocent person would be bombed to shreds, needs to seriously re-evalute their priorities in this world.

nashtymavsfan13 · 08-31-2006, 01:48 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by fluid.forty.one

I can't believe the "greatest story ever told" is being discussed on a Mavs forum

Yeah, it is the greatest stroy ever told, because it's not just a story. We discuss lots of politics and opinions on this board that have nothing to do with basketball on this board, so there's no reason to not talk about this.