A little perspective for anyone who wants it.

[rmacomic]

*Shortly after the Mavs big win in game two I received a phone call from my friend Marc.

He was the best man at my wedding and is easily my best friend. We met almost twenty years ago, hit it off right away and have been good buddies ever since. Marc and I played in bands together, rose allot of hell, and even spent a few nights in a county lock up together. We shared so many great moments of misspent youth, I can not even recall half of the insane shit we got up to. Marc joined the Army after our last band split up in the wake of our good friend and drummer being killed, and he and I have not seen each other much in the last few years, however, we talk on the phone for a few hours every couple of weeks.

*I thought Marc was calling to comment on the game, as he knows I am a huge Mavs fan.

Marc has had it rough the last few years. He was deployed twice to Iraq, returned home to a wife that almost immediately filled for a divorce, and to make matters worse he had relocated with her to be near her family in Arizona. Now he is stuck in a city he hates away from friends and family in order to finish his degree. He is rarely negative about it, but I know his life sucks out there, and he is not very happy with his circumstances.

*The call was not about the game.

Marc's family back home was never very supportive of him. Maybe it was due to him being adopted and an only child, or maybe he was just too different from the majority of his typical small town southern kin, whatever the cause his father Dale is the only real familial relationship he has. He gets along great with his dad even when his own mother will barley speak to him.

*After speaking with Marc for over an hour, the high I had from the game had completely spun into a full on depression.

The last time I had spoken to Marc, he said he was looking forward to flying back to Arkansas in a few weeks to spend some time with his father. They were going to play some golf, share a few beers, reconnect, and probably irritate his mom. Marc would leave, and eventually his mother and father would start speaking to each other. Hell, The last time Marc visited his folks, his mom kicked Dale out of the house for a few days. I am sure the animosity between mother and child is not of a one sided cause, but the tension is noticeable to anyone, and seems mostly to come from his mom. Yet for all that negativity the two tolerate each other for the most part, if only to make his dad happy.

*Marc had been trying to call me for several hours, but I had my phone off during the game.

Marc's dad was on the job for the Highway Department, when he was sucked under a street sweeper. The driver failed to give an all clear and proceeded to back up over Dale as he was clearing debris behind the truck. The driver didn't even notice what he had done and drove down the road with Dale trapped underneath for nearly a mile until a motorists stopped the driver. Anderson Dale Williams was pronounced dead by the paramedics who arrived on the scene. He was less than a year away from retirement.

*My best friend had lost his father and the only connection to a family that had grown increasingly distant over the years.

Making matters worse the state medical examiner, actually lost Dales body for several hours, He was found at the mortuary already embalmed, before the autopsy and toxicology could be done. Now the autopsy, which must be done in on the job deaths of government employees, will render Dales body unable to be re-embalmed. The family won't even be able to have an open casket funeral. Today he told me that the Highway Department is already sending a lawyer on Monday to discuss their "options." The man isn't even in the ground yet, and they are already trying to mitigate their losses.

*When I saw Marc's name on my phone, I got excited about the opportunity to blab about a game he doesn't even like. I still feel terrible for it.

I watched a few minutes of tonight's game, but my heart just wasn't into it. I understand we didn't win. Somehow when I think of the pain and loss my friend is going through, the excitement or disappointment of a game seems pretty shallow. For me to feel sad because my team didn't win seems almost selfish right now. I am not saying anyone else should feel that way, but for me the sting of a team loosing a game, or even a chance at a title, seems pathetic and pointless when compared to real loss.

*I called my dad afterwards to let him know the bad news and to tell him how much I love him.

[fluid.forty.one]

Thanks for making this post.

[chumdawg]

Why would they want an open casket funeral??

[rmacomic]

Originally Posted by chumdawg

Why would they want an open casket funeral??

I have never been to a funeral that wasn't open casket. That the option was taken from his family, due to someone's incompetence, only compounds the hurt and frustration they are feeling. I don't understand your question.

[Big Boy Laroux]

Definitely puts things into perspective. Sorry to hear about this.

As for chum, he may be thinking of funeral as the actual process out at the gravesite, burying the body.

rmacomic is probably thinking of the wake, most of which are open casket, where you can see the body one last time.

[Murphy3]

Most funerals that I have been to have been open casket. Actually all of the funerals that I've been to have been open casket. Unfortunately, I've been to quite a few family members' funerals the past 3-4 years.

[Mav Addict]

In the big scheme of things basketball is nothing....do you think the homeless, sick and shut in, or even the unemployed worker who is desperately looking for work to feed his family care about the NBA?

I have a cousin same age is me, that discovered a blood clot in their arm this weekend...went to sleep Saturday night, and woke up blind in one eye yesterday morning...I was nervous watching the game in the 4th, but after the lose I moved on

[Smiles]

Yes, it's a good point that we should all keep a proper perspective.

Im so sorry for the horrific loss your friend has experienced. I hope he finds love and family in the remainder of his life.

Ive never been to a funeral that was open casket. My father is actually the only person Ive seen after they died.

[Murphy3]

Of the 10-15 funerals that I've been to, I can't think of any that weren't open casket. I wasn't able to make it to one of my cousin's funeral.. It was closed casket. He was in a horrific car accident that left an open casket funeral out of the question.

It might just be a family thing. I've been to about a dozen family members' funerals and they were all open casket. I've only been to 2-3 non family member funerals..but they were open casket as well.

[Murphy3]

Anyways, back to the subject at hand. I know that when my brother was on his death bed, the Cowboys were still important to him. We had an in depth conversation about why he wanted to talk about next year for the Cowboys when he only had a few days left... The Cowboys were something that had been a huge part of his life. It was something that was important to him up through his dying days.