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05-27-2009, 12:09 PM
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#481 |
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Diamond Member
Join Date: Mar 2007
Location: Deutschland
Posts: 7,885
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Lightning closeup English channel, yesterday.
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05-27-2009, 12:15 PM
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#482 | |
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Moderator
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: 41.21.1
Posts: 36,143
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Quote:
It's pretty freaking amazing to get that close OVER WATER and not get struck...
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 These days being a fan is a competition to see who can be the most upset when your team loses. That proves you love winning more. That's how it works. |
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05-27-2009, 12:25 PM
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#483 |
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Diamond Member
Join Date: Mar 2007
Location: Deutschland
Posts: 7,885
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No, it wasn´t me. It was a guy either on the travel from GB to France or a guy on the shore taking pictures.
The BENELUX got hit very hard yesterday. But it´s not that exciting for Texas people. And yes, the situation sure was dangerous for the photographers. Ah, and: It was a zoom lens not a regular. But still close range.
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Last edited by GermanDunk; 05-27-2009 at 12:27 PM. |
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05-27-2009, 02:23 PM
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#484 |
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Diamond Member
Join Date: Sep 2007
Posts: 5,249
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 Still too close for my taste.
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 Is this ghost ball?? |
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05-29-2009, 12:02 PM
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#485 |
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Rooting for the laundry
Join Date: May 2006
Posts: 21,342
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 Two different kinds of fluff? I can't even fathom it.
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06-01-2009, 11:44 AM
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#486 |
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Diamond Member
Join Date: Mar 2007
Location: Deutschland
Posts: 7,885
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Come where the flavour is.
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Last edited by GermanDunk; 06-02-2009 at 12:00 PM. |
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06-03-2009, 11:06 AM
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#487 |
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Diamond Member
Join Date: Jul 2005
Location: Between Blue Lines
Posts: 4,425
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__________________
 "I still go through it in my head," Nowitzki said. "One of my last nights in Germany [last month], I was trying to go to sleep, but I couldn't. I was thinking about the free throw I missed [late in Game 3], about different situations that happened in that series. I'll never forget it. It's going to stay in my mind until we win it all." |
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06-03-2009, 11:30 AM
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#488 |
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Platinum Member
Join Date: Oct 2006
Location: TX
Posts: 2,505
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 Tell me we haven't all thought this about referees at one point in time. |
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06-06-2009, 02:20 PM
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#489 |
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Diamond Member
Join Date: Mar 2007
Location: Deutschland
Posts: 7,885
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The Duchess of Cornwall got pwned
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06-08-2009, 03:28 PM
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#490 |
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Diamond Member
Join Date: Jul 2005
Location: Between Blue Lines
Posts: 4,425
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"I still go through it in my head," Nowitzki said. "One of my last nights in Germany [last month], I was trying to go to sleep, but I couldn't. I was thinking about the free throw I missed [late in Game 3], about different situations that happened in that series. I'll never forget it. It's going to stay in my mind until we win it all." |
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06-10-2009, 11:09 AM
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#491 |
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Platinum Member
Join Date: Oct 2006
Location: TX
Posts: 2,505
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Rock, Paper, Scissors
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06-11-2009, 07:42 PM
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#492 |
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Platinum Member
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: hogwarts - school of witchcraft and wizardry
Posts: 2,301
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toe thumb
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i bleed burnt orange. Hook 'Em Horns \m/ |
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06-16-2009, 03:40 PM
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#493 |
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Diamond Member
Join Date: Mar 2007
Location: Deutschland
Posts: 7,885
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Last edited by GermanDunk; 06-16-2009 at 03:41 PM. |
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06-17-2009, 05:18 PM
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#494 |
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Platinum Member
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: hogwarts - school of witchcraft and wizardry
Posts: 2,301
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What happened to Anna K?
she is so skinny now. 
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i bleed burnt orange. Hook 'Em Horns \m/ |
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06-17-2009, 05:58 PM
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#495 |
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Diamond Member
Join Date: Nov 2003
Location: Miami, FL
Posts: 6,653
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She decided she can't keep up her tennist image and probably is gonna go for modelling.
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Let's go Mavs! |
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06-18-2009, 10:18 AM
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#496 |
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Diamond Member
Join Date: Mar 2007
Location: Deutschland
Posts: 7,885
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 Well builder
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Last edited by GermanDunk; 06-18-2009 at 10:18 AM. |
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06-18-2009, 01:59 PM
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#497 |
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Platinum Member
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: hogwarts - school of witchcraft and wizardry
Posts: 2,301
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i bleed burnt orange. Hook 'Em Horns \m/ |
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06-26-2009, 11:54 AM
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#498 |
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Platinum Member
Join Date: Oct 2006
Location: TX
Posts: 2,505
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Letter >From The Boss...
Memo: As the CEO of this organization, I have resigned myself to the fact that Barrack Obama is our President and that our taxes and government fees will increase in a BIG way. To compensate for these increases, our prices would have to increase by about 10%. But since we cannot increase our prices right now due to the dismal state of the economy, we will have to lay off sixty of our employees instead. This has really been bothering me, since I believe we are family here and I didn't know how to choose who would have to go. So, this is what I did. I walked through our parking lots and found sixty 'Obama' bumper stickers on our employees' cars and have decided these folks will be the ones to let go. I can't think of a more fair way to approach this problem. They voted for change, I gave it to them. |
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06-26-2009, 01:06 PM
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#499 |
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Diamond Member
Join Date: Mar 2007
Location: Deutschland
Posts: 7,885
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You are CEO of " all the best for your baby ? "
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06-26-2009, 01:16 PM
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#500 |
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Moderator
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: 41.21.1
Posts: 36,143
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The funniest part about that "letter from the boss" is that it's 100% illegal to fire someone for their political beliefs in this country - the spirit of that propaganda piece goes against the very principles America was founded upon!
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These days being a fan is a competition to see who can be the most upset when your team loses. That proves you love winning more. That's how it works. Last edited by Underdog; 06-26-2009 at 01:17 PM. |
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06-26-2009, 02:58 PM
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#501 | |
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Diamond Member
Join Date: Feb 2001
Posts: 7,673
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Quote:
believe it or not, i was in a harassment/discrimination seminar just yesterday (it was for EVERYONE at my company, i didn't do anything), and this very topic came up. Political views are actually NOT one of the protected categories (like race, gender, age, religion, disability, etc.). I'm not saying someone couldn't sue and possibly make some money and maybe get it added to the protected categories... but right now, it is not one of them.
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Last edited by Big Boy Laroux; 06-26-2009 at 03:02 PM. |
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06-26-2009, 03:06 PM
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#502 | |
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Platinum Member
Join Date: Oct 2006
Location: TX
Posts: 2,505
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06-26-2009, 03:11 PM
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#503 |
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Diamond Member
Join Date: Feb 2001
Posts: 7,673
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well, the joke still isn't funny. But just thought i would share an interesting bit of info i learned yesterday (because i, too, thought it was 100% illegal).
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06-26-2009, 03:14 PM
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#504 | |
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Diamond Member
Join Date: Aug 2003
Location: Just outside the Metroplex
Posts: 5,539
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Quote:
Now, if someone that got canned had that email, then I would think they could win a few months pay at least though. I'd bet there is a lawyer that reads this site that could give better information than I though.
__________________
 "A government big enough to give you everything you want, is strong enough to take everything you have". Gerald Ford "Life's tough, it's even tougher if you're stupid." -John Wayne There are four boxes to be used in defense of liberty: soap, ballot, jury, and ammo. Please use in that order. -Capt. Bob "Wolf" Johnson |
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06-26-2009, 03:17 PM
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#505 | |
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Diamond Member
Join Date: Mar 2007
Location: Deutschland
Posts: 7,885
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Quote:
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06-26-2009, 03:21 PM
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#506 | |
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Diamond Member
Join Date: Feb 2001
Posts: 7,673
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Quote:
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Last edited by Big Boy Laroux; 06-26-2009 at 03:21 PM. |
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06-26-2009, 03:23 PM
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#507 |
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Platinum Member
Join Date: Oct 2006
Location: TX
Posts: 2,505
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FWIW...this is a "JOKE" thread, hence the title of the thread to begin. Let's try to not take this stuff too seriously.
It may not make everyone laug, but I know of quite a few who are laughing at the joke...so I thought I'ld share it. I'm done for this joke today...best wishes to all of you out there!!! Life is good, relax and enjoy the wisdom of ... whomever you want... |
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06-30-2009, 06:35 PM
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#508 |
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Moderator
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: 41.21.1
Posts: 36,143
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These people could represent you one day - choose wisely!
These are from a book called 'Disorder in the American Courts' and are
things people actually said in court, word for word, taken down and now published by court reporters that had the torment of staying calm while these exchanges were actually taking place: ____________________________________________ ATTORNEY: This myasthenia gravis, does it affect your memory at all? WITNESS: Yes. ATTORNEY: And in what ways does it affect your memory? WITNESS: I forget. ATTORNEY: You forget? Can you give us an example of something you forgot? ____________________________________________ ATTORNEY: Now doctor, isn't it true that when a person dies in his sleep, he doesn't know about it until the next morning? WITNESS: Did you actually pass the bar exam? ____________________________________________ ATTORNEY: The youngest son, the twenty-year-old, how old is he? WITNESS: He's twenty, much like your IQ. ____________________________________________ ATTORNEY: Were you present when your picture was taken? WITNESS: Are you sh!tting me? ____________________________________________ ATTORNEY: So the date of conception (of the baby) was August 8th? WITNESS: Yes. ATTORNEY: And what were you doing at that time? WITNESS: Getting laid ____________________________________________ ATTORNEY: She had three children, right? WITNESS: Yes. ATTORNEY: How many were boys? WITNESS: None. ATTORNEY: Were there any girls? WITNESS : Your Honor, I think I need a different attorney. Can I get a new attorney? ____________________________________________ ATTORNEY: How was your first marriage terminated? WITNESS: By death. ATTORNEY: And by whose death was it terminated? WITNESS: Take a guess. ____________________________________________ ATTORNEY: Can you describe the individual? WITNESS: He was about medium height and had a beard.. ATTORNEY: Was this a male or a female? WITNESS: Unless the Circus was in town I'm going with male. ____________________________________________ ATTORNEY: Is your appearance here this morning pursuant to a deposition notice which I sent to your attorney? WITNESS: No, this is how I dress when I go to work. ____________________________________________ ATTORNEY: Doctor, how many of your autopsies have you performed on dead people? WITNESS: All of them. The live ones put up too much of a fight. ____________________________________________ ATTORNEY: ALL your responses MUST be oral, OK? What school did you go to? WITNESS: Oral. ____________________________________________ ATTORNEY: Do you recall the time that you examined the body? WITNESS: The autopsy started around 8:30 p.m. ATTORNEY: And Mr. Denton was dead at the time? WITNESS: If not, he was by the time I finished. ____________________________________________ ATTORNEY: Are you qualified to give a urine sample? WITNESS: Are you qualified to ask that question? ____________________________________________ ATTORNEY: Doctor, before you performed the autopsy, did you check for a pulse? WITNESS: No. ATTORNEY: Did you check for blood pressure? WITNESS: No. ATTORNEY: Did you check for breathing? WITNESS: No. ATTORNEY: So, then it is possible that the patient was alive when you began the autopsy? WITNESS: No. ATTORNEY: How can you be so sure, Doctor? WITNESS: Because his brain was sitting on my desk in a jar. ATTORNEY: I see, but could the patient have still been alive, nevertheless? WITNESS: Yes, it is possible that he could have been alive and practicing law.
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These days being a fan is a competition to see who can be the most upset when your team loses. That proves you love winning more. That's how it works. Last edited by Underdog; 06-30-2009 at 06:50 PM. Reason: just realized this thread is for pics, but I do that all the time anyway so eff it! |
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07-01-2009, 05:46 PM
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#509 |
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Diamond Member
Join Date: Jul 2005
Location: Between Blue Lines
Posts: 4,425
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I miss when this thread had joke pictures.
__________________
"I still go through it in my head," Nowitzki said. "One of my last nights in Germany [last month], I was trying to go to sleep, but I couldn't. I was thinking about the free throw I missed [late in Game 3], about different situations that happened in that series. I'll never forget it. It's going to stay in my mind until we win it all." |
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07-01-2009, 05:53 PM
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#510 | |
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Moderator
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: 41.21.1
Posts: 36,143
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Quote:
__________________
These days being a fan is a competition to see who can be the most upset when your team loses. That proves you love winning more. That's how it works. Last edited by Underdog; 07-01-2009 at 05:53 PM. |
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07-01-2009, 06:18 PM
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#511 |
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Diamond Member
Join Date: Sep 2007
Posts: 5,249
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 Better?
__________________
Is this ghost ball?? |
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07-01-2009, 09:45 PM
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#512 |
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Moderator
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: 41.21.1
Posts: 36,143
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__________________
These days being a fan is a competition to see who can be the most upset when your team loses. That proves you love winning more. That's how it works. |
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07-02-2009, 07:34 AM
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#513 | |
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Member
Join Date: Feb 2009
Location: Addison
Posts: 339
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Quote:
Wow.
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F@*K THE SPURS!! |
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07-02-2009, 09:56 AM
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#514 |
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Platinum Member
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: hogwarts - school of witchcraft and wizardry
Posts: 2,301
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__________________
i bleed burnt orange. Hook 'Em Horns \m/ |
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07-03-2009, 09:34 AM
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#515 |
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Diamond Member
Join Date: Apr 2006
Location: North Laredo
Posts: 7,995
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__________________
 "Dirk Nowitzki is now a household name in every locker room in this world. You say it in Brazil, you say Dirk, they know Nowitzki. You say it in China, they know Nowitzki. Kobe, Michael, DIRK." - Jeff Van Gundy |
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07-03-2009, 02:23 PM
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#516 | |
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Platinum Member
Join Date: Jan 2007
Location: Seattle, WA
Posts: 2,012
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Quote:
MR. KUNSTLER: After you arrived in Chicago did you have any discussion with Jerry? THE WITNESS: Yes, I did. We discussed the nomination of a pig for President. MR. KUNSTLER: Would you state what you said and what Jerry said. THE WITNESS: We discussed the details. We discussed going out to the countryside around Chicago and buying a pig from a farmer and bringing him into the city for the purposes of his nominating speech. MR. KUNSTLER: Did you have any role yourself in that? THE WITNESS: Yes, I helped select the pig, and I paid for him. MR. KUNSTLER: Now, did you find a pig at once when you went out? THE WITNESS: No, it was very difficult. We stopped at several farms and asked where the pigs were. MR. KUNSTLER: None of the farmers referred you to the police station, did they? THE WITNESS: No. MR. FORAN: Objection. THE COURT: I sustain the objection. MR. KUNSTLER: Mr. Ochs, can you describe the pig which was finally bought? MR. FORAN: Objection. THE COURT., I sustain the objection. MR. KUNSTLER: Would you state what, if anything, happened to the pig? THE WITNESS: The pig was arrested with seven people. MR. KUNSTLER: When did that take place? THE WITNESS: This took place on the morning of August 23, at the Civic Center underneath the Picasso sculpture. MR. KUNSTLER: Who were those seven people? THE WITNESS: Jerry Rubin. Stew Albert, Wolfe Lowenthal, myself is four; I am not sure of the names of the other three. MR. KUNSTLER: What were you doing when you were arrested? THE WITNESS: We were arrested announcing the pig's candidacy for President. MR. KUNSTLER: Did Jerry Rubin speak? THE WITNESS: Yes, Jerry Rubin was reading a prepared speech for the pig---the opening sentence was something like, "I, Pigasus, hereby announce my candidacy for the Presidency of the United States." He was interrupted in his talk by the police who arrested us. MR. KUNSTLER: What was the pig doing during this announcement? MR. FORAN: Objection. MR. KUNSTLER: Do you remember what you were charged with? THE WITNESS: I believe the original charge mentioned was something about an old Chicago law about bringing livestock into the city, or disturbing the peace, or disorderly conduct, and when it came time for the trial, I believe the charge was disorderly conduct. MR. KUNSTLER: Were you informed by an officer that the pig had squealed on you? THE WITNESS: Yes.
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07-06-2009, 10:46 AM
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#517 |
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Diamond Member
Join Date: Aug 2003
Location: Just outside the Metroplex
Posts: 5,539
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I know this one is wrong, but I am going to tell it anyway. (yes it is in the wrong thread as well - but I am too lazy to look up the joke instead of joke picture thread)
------------------------------------------------------- What a day!!!!!! Farrah Fawcett dies and gets to purgatory. St. Peter allow her one wish. She wishes that all the children in the world could remain safe. St. Peter says OK, he will allow this wish. Bam -- wish granted -- Michael Jackson falls dead in his tracks. Michael Jackson dies and wonder what happened. He goes to purgatory and St. Peter allows him one wish. Michael says well, I had a great life, but I just can't believe what happened to me when I used that OxyClean -- please don't allow that to happen to anyone else. Wouldn't you know it -- BAM -- Billy Mays dies in his sleep. Lesson to the story -- Be careful what you wish for.................
__________________
"A government big enough to give you everything you want, is strong enough to take everything you have". Gerald Ford "Life's tough, it's even tougher if you're stupid." -John Wayne There are four boxes to be used in defense of liberty: soap, ballot, jury, and ammo. Please use in that order. -Capt. Bob "Wolf" Johnson Last edited by dalmations202; 07-06-2009 at 10:48 AM. |
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07-08-2009, 04:54 PM
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#518 |
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Diamond Member
Join Date: Sep 2007
Posts: 5,249
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__________________
Is this ghost ball?? Last edited by DirkFTW; 07-08-2009 at 04:54 PM. |
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07-08-2009, 05:43 PM
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#519 |
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Diamond Member
Join Date: Jul 2005
Location: Between Blue Lines
Posts: 4,425
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__________________
"I still go through it in my head," Nowitzki said. "One of my last nights in Germany [last month], I was trying to go to sleep, but I couldn't. I was thinking about the free throw I missed [late in Game 3], about different situations that happened in that series. I'll never forget it. It's going to stay in my mind until we win it all." |
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07-09-2009, 01:04 PM
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#520 |
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Diamond Member
Join Date: Nov 2008
Location: behind you
Posts: 6,248
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| fluffin hilarious, got a bit fluffy in here, what the fluff?, who's your daddy |
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