To be a Republican

[Raviadso]

To be a Republican, you have to believe that ....

1) throwing money at Africa in the form of AIDS drugs while nursing mothersmilk from the christian right and not supplying condoms or safe-sex education to billions is okay. Something that would cost billions less and prevent the spread of HIV/AIDS isnt as good as spending more to slow down the dying process. One Condom, one class, one safe sexual encounter= trillions of dollars. Years of expensive treatments for somene who already is dying, while allowing millions more to contract the disease= cents.
2) Someday we will find Weapons of Mass Destruction in Iraq. (Okay this is a little off, since Rumsfeld sold Iraq a starter kit in 1984, so we all knew they had the potential 19 years ago.)
3) Iraq was a danger to national security and that they had connections with Al Qaida. (no connections have been found)
4) that Scientists from Exxon Mobil have disproven global warming
5) that cigarettes do not cause cancer
6) we can ignore deeper societal problems and use sound clips like "no spin zone", "guns dont kill people, people kill people", or "fair and balanced"
7) that "freedom" is a physical possession and not a concept that comes in times of peace and prosperity
8) Bush was being honest when he said he cared about unemployment when, during the Bush administration, we have seen negative job growth for the first time since herbert hoover
9) tax cuts are the answer to the problem
10) tax cuts are the answer
11) the problem is...well republicans havent figured that one out yet
12) tax cuts lead to economic prosperity, when the only president that saw greater prosperity after tax cuts was Kennedy.
13) tax cuts don't hurt the economy. Think Reagan, Reagan, Bush sr.
14) the government does'nt give larger companies (like Bush's friends' company Enron) special treatment, so they shouldnt pay any more taxes for the loopholes and legislation they are given
15) you earn money equal to how hard you are allowed to work, not by who you know and who youre parents are
16) we can invest in hydrogen cars that are 20 years down the road while lowering emissions standards and giving tax credits for buying large SUVs
17) Clinton letting his cock out is more important than lies that have led to 5,000 civilians dying in Iraq, and more than 195 US soldiers killed
18) we can worship our army but cut funding and health care to soldiers (actually proposed)
19) John Poindexter (Mr. Iran-Contra) was a good appointee to a post where he would oversee the total information awareness act
20) enemy soldiers arent human and so are not entitled to human rights that are allotted to us in the constitution and thus can be locked up without trial, charges or defense).
21) one mind is better than many. The UN is just a bunch of hippy peaceniks.
22) all democrats are for banning gun sales. Howard Dean is for loosening national gun restrictions and giving the power to the states.
23) Privacy is for those that have something to hide
24) Israel is proof of how violent destruction of those that oppose you can stop violence
25) a "no child left behind" policy will erase years of under-funding schools and decreased funding of schools that are already hurting
26) holding teachers responsible for students that dont want to learn is a viable option for scapegoating
27) trickledown works
28) refusing health care to illegal immigrants is okay but having them work as diswashers, prep cooks, maids, and construction workers at unlivable wages is okay.
30) it is okay to appoint a judicial nominee who said, quote, "The wife is to subordinate herself to her husband...to place herself under the authority of the man."
31) illegalizing abortion will make the issue dissapear, instead of looking to other countries where the illegalization of abortion directly caused thousands to die because of botched, illegal procedures.
32) dissaproving of abortion means making it illegal.
33) Bush is right in giving tax cuts when the nation went from its largest surplus to it's largest deficit in two years
34) people that want health care can afford it when more than 33% of people dont have it
35) It is okay to bail out companies that have botched finances (even where the CEO embezzled money) but bankruptcy laws for individuals should be made more strict
36) can defend "democritzation" of other countries while seeking to redistrict states like Texas to dissenfranchise voters
37) military strength and a strong stock market are more important indicators of the economy than the national debt, the unemployment and the average wage of workers in this country.
38) Geraldo and Ollie North are "balanced" and "truth interested" pundits.
39) conscienscious nonviolence is unamerican
40) prudent patience on policy is weakness
41) Gore was wrong in wanting a recount of the 2000 election even when the margin between the candidates was within the margin of error, but some rich nobody that doesnt like an election can bankroll a recall election even when it puts a state deeper into debt
42) we should not provide child care to women- it is providing unequal support for women when in California hundreds of thousands of women that are working, could not if they lost their state-subsidized child-care. The difference in price between the childcare and welfare for the mothers? It costs 85% less to give them child care.
43) our national security was actually at risk in Iraq
44) the war on drugs is working (okay that is bipartisan)
45) there is such a thing as a "war on terrorism"
46) Afganis are better off now than they were in 2001.
47) the French don't know anything about war
48) the Germans dont know anything about war
49) it's okay that a state-provided lawyer is more than 50% more likely to have his/her client lose
50) it's okay that a months supply of drugs can cost thousands of dollars.
51) morality can be seperated from religion and that the government should enforce morals on individuals (while often forgetting about white collar criminals
52) supply side economics works...
53) a tongue in cheek letter by opining writer, Al Franken is proof he is not credible, while Anne Coulter writes a book with less than a page of justification for her ideas and she is the real "truth teller". Her blatant disregard for intellectual institutions of accurately quoting "sources" is a sign that she is ahead of her time
54) Bush was a better governor than Anne Richards
55) it is okay to have corporate interests log forests and make money to make sure those horrible fires don't continue, when precise thinning will provide for more safe and healthy forests while
56) it is okay to give private contracts under the table to friends of your administration in Iraq
57) it is okay to give private contracts under the table to a company where the vice-president was once a CEO
58) Keynsian economics can be reversed- there is no chance of another 1930 depression happening again, and all the economists that have proven social programs help calm the tempestuous economy are false.
59) Bush is a good president
60) someone who ditched the military in vietnam can be promoted to "commander and chief" of the army
61) educated people should not rule the country, charismatic people like Reagan and Schwartzenegger should. Actors make better executives of government than life-trained politicians
62) the south is doing well
63) the world is against us
64) terrorism is an irrational hatred of Americans
65) it is okay to stop funding to NGOs, and okay to funnel that money through the catholic church
66) that administrators, teachers and principals are not trying their darndest, devoting their life to making a better world for their kids and getting cents on the dollar for it
67) everything should be privatized
68) deficits are fun!
69) cowboys, actors that play cowboys, or actors that had 40' biceps are qualified to run the world, while actors are disallowed from speaking their mind, even after visiting other countries and talking with citizens of the country.
70) the way to stop terrorism is to orphan people in countries that havent been linked to supporting terrorism
71) the way to stop terrorism is to fight wars in Iraq and Afganistan while innadequately funding the coast guard and other organizations that will protect America.