Word Play
The Washington Post's Style Invitational asks readers to take any word from the dictionary, alter it by adding, subtracting, or changing one letter, and supply a new definition. Here are last year's winners:
1. Intaxication: euphoria at getting a tax refund, which lasts until you realize it was your money to start with.
2. Reintarnation: coming back to life as a hillbilly.
3. Bozone: the substance surrounding stupid people that stops bright ideas from penetrating. The bozone layer, unfortunately, shows little sign of breaking down in the near future.
4. Foreploy: any misrepresentation about yourself for the purpose of getting laid.
5. Cashtration: the act of buying a house, which renders the subject financially impotent for an indefinite period.
6. Giraffiti: vandalism spray-painted very, very high.
7. Sarchasm: the gulf between the author of sarcastic wit and the person who doesn't get it.
8. Inoculatte: to take coffee intravenously when you are running late.
9. Hipatitis: terminal coolness.
10. Osteopornosis: a degenerate disease. (This one got extra credit.)
11. Karmageddon: it's like, when everybody is sending off all these really bad vibes, right? And then, like, the earth explodes and it's like, a serious bummer.
12. Decafalon: the grueling event of getting through the day by consuming only things that are good for you.
13. Glibido: all talk and no action.
14. Dopeler Effect: the tendency of stupid ideas to seem smarter when they come at you rapidly.
15. Arachnoleptic Fit: the franticdance performed just after you've accidentally walked through a spider web.
16. Beelzebug: Satan in the form of a mosquito that gets into your bedroom at three in the morning and cannot be cast out.
17. Caterpallor: the color you turn after finding half a grub in the fruit you're eating.
And the pick of the literature:
18.Ignoranus: a person who's both stupid and an asshole.
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